A year ago, I was walking around in a sleep-deprived haze, my breasts felt like they would explode at any second, and every 10 seconds I’d shift on the couch and my, um, undercarriage would cry out in pain and I would think, OMG I have a baby. I GAVE BIRTH to him less than a week ago. I would tuck the little guy between me and my arm, on the Boppy of course, and nurse him for 20 minutes, never wanting it to end (but then remember: I get to do this again in an hour). I would sit and stare at him, and usually cry while doing so. Being a new parent was the weirdest thing I’ve ever been through. (And stressful. I didn’t even put him down the ENTIRE FIRST NIGHT HOME.)
Two years ago, we were just starting to try to conceive. I was poring over websites dedicated to tracking your ovulation. And I’d pass on all the (gory) details to my husband. I purchased my first pregnancy book, The Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy. I immediately flipped to the back, to the “Labor and Delivery” section, praying to God there was a section entitled, “It Won’t Hurt That Bad”. There wasn’t.
I remember seeing those Johnson & Johnson commercials before I had a kid, the ones that say “A baby changes everything”. I thought, well they don’t have to change every single thing. That’s crazy. But, they do. As corny as it sounds, they really do. There is no part of my life left untouched my by little man. And I truly have a hard time remember what life was like before him. What it was like to decide at 9pm that you were going to go out for beers with friends at 9:30. What it was like to pop out the door for five minutes to go grab something at the grocery store. What it was like to sleep from 10pm to 10am. What it was like before I had this new piece of my soul that I am now convinced I could not live without. Happy, happy birthday my sweet boy. Here’s to many more.