5 comments on “Contact Beth

  1. Beth,

    I discovered your article about sharing, and I will say it’s going to may me choose to be more consistent with guidelines for sharing. I need to follow this rule for other things, but one day at a time, shall we?

    My reason for contacting you is an interest in the co-op preschool idea. I live in Indiana, and I’ve often thought this strategy for childcare to be a great idea, i just am not sure how to structure it, or find those who would want the same type of arrangement. Would you be able to tell me a bit more about it?

    Please and thank you,

  2. Love the article on sharing & agree with all you said. I have applied the concept to my children; however, I feel that kids need to be taught to share as in group work. For example, if my child is playing with Legos, which there are tons and a friend joins him & wants to play, I am going to tell him he needs to share & let little jimmy play too. To me teaching kids to share teaches them how to be able to work with others & get along with them. But on the other hand if Toy has a specific Lego, Jimmy isn’t allowed to take it from him just because he wants it: as you pointed out the article. Overall I like your point of view & agree; yet, I think you need to also address the fact that kids need to learn to share in the right situations without giving up the specific item they have in their hand. You teach your kids to never share, as in the Lego scenario, then they are going to grow up extremely selfish & never think of others. It has to be balanced. Teach them to share, but with boundaries of “no” you can’t take what I have. A time to share, a time not to share. Like if your son has a car & goes to the park & bobby always wants his car, I agree in no way way should your child give it to him just because the other kid wants it. But it would teach your child compassion & thoughtfulness of others to say “hey, let’s being Bobby another car to play with so y’all can play together”…Just a thought. & of course some kids are just gonna be brats & only want what others have. Good article though, I just feel sharing is still appropriate to teach kids without making them give up what their playing with.

    1. Completely agree with Jennifer. I think your approach Betb has major flaws – you say: teach kids how to get something through hard work and dedication – how does that relate to a child that has a bike for an hour while another child also wants to try it? Has your son ‘earned’ riding that bike? Doubt it. Also, as Jebnifer points out, you are basically teaching your kid to be entirely selfish and have no social manners at all. What it are saying is: when a group of people is in s social situation and the fun is to have everyone having a good time – just forget about the others and enjoy yourself alone….’ because, I came first and therefore I ‘earned’ it.’ That’s complete BS. Trust me. And it’s pseudo science on your side.
      I used to be a semi professional athlete and the team captain and I now a 6 month old son. One of the best things I learned being head of the team is sharing and subsequently team work. It one of the best lessons that people can have in life and I certainly will pass that on in the right way to my son.

      1. The children at our preschool are always asked first if they are willing to share the desired toy. And more often than not, they do it. My article speaks only to the few times they don’t. And preschoolers have short attention spans, it’s almost never more than 20 minutes or so before the toy is passed on. And we diligently keep track of whose turn it is, so those children know they can trust that patience will pay off.

        My son has also been on the “losing” end of these situations plenty of times. So, he’s learning too what it feels like. He’s learning the empathy needed to be more willing to share down the line. This approach does not discourage sharing or generosity, we just don’t force a child to hand over a toy they aren’t done playing with, that’s it.

  3. What does “to share something with another human being” really mean? Does it maybe mean thinking of people other than ourselves and dropping our ego and so realising the oneness that we all are?
    Not sharing and isolation between people is one of the worst things in :grown-up” society today. Competition and ownership. We take nothing with us when we die. Life is about love and giving to others, be this offering what we have to others that don’t, or offering our time and support. Lets teach our children how the world SHOULD be rather than making them except all that is wrong with it.

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