The first thing out of my mouth when my doctor had told me what happened was, “But, I told so many people.”
In those first moments, that was my biggest source of stress and fear and sadness: having to turn around and tell everyone the terrible news.
And I went over it and over it in my head for days before figuring out what to say and how to say it. WHY had I told everyone? WHAT had come over me? WHO did I think I was?
I knew I had to just say it, to get it out there in the open. Like ripping off a band-aid. It would be painful, it would be awkward, but it just had to be done.
When I did start letting people know, I got the hugest heaping helping of love and support from so many people, some of which I have never even met in real life. Many of them had suffered similar losses in the past, and had gone on to have a full brood, and I found that really helpful to hear.
It helps me deal with things to have all that support and understanding, which is helping me cope with the whole “telling people too soon” thing. I thank you all for your kindness, love and understanding as I tread these very murky waters.