Bowie’s latest activity of choice has been to find a tube of toothpaste, during the 10 seconds I am distracted from him each day, squirt a bunch of it into his hand, and smear it around the bathroom.
I have allowed this to happen, and had to take on the cumbersome task of cleaning it up (cumbersome? Yes. Why don’t you go smear toothpaste all over your bathroom and try cleaning it up, and we will discuss.), no less than 5 times (THUS FAR). And the only thing more annoying than cleaning up a particularly sloppy and difficult mess left by a toddler is having to do it more than once.
I’ve tried all of that “they’re only little once” and “try not to focus on the moments when they are bad, but instead on the moments when they are sweet”. But, we all know those sweet moments are few and far between. And SWEET JESUS IN HEAVEN, I HAVEN’T BEEN ABLE TO SMELL ANYTHING BUT COLGATE FOR AN HOUR AND HE’S WASTED ALMOST AN ENTIRE TUBE OF TOOTHPASTE AND LOOK AT ALL THE TOOTHPASTE STAINS ON OUR CLOTHES. Ahem.
Sometimes, I’m just not patient enough to hold in the anger. It comes spilling out like angry volcano lava.
But then, after all that anger finds its way out, and you have unleashed it all upon your child, that’s when you look down into those big, innocent eyes and realize crap. He was just a normal, curious toddler who liked the feel of the toothpaste squishing between his fingers, and now I’ve gone and hurt his feelings. This is all my fault anyway, for not paying attention while I was on the phone.
Motherhood is the single most frustrating thing on earth. I’m sure of it. Someone should study that.