Group Therapy: The Other Shoe

Some of you may remember my epic post a while back about the issues I have with worry and anxiety. And I was doing REALLY well for a while there, getting good amounts of sleep, not worrying at all about kiddo while he’s at preschool, I mean phenomenally good for me.

But, we’ve had several close friends suffer some heavy stuff lately. No details, because that’s not the point. The point of me telling you that is…I am back to my old ways of sitting around, waiting for the next bad thing to happen, which I’m always certain will happen to me.

My mind is swirling these days with worst-case-scenario junk, and I can’t for the life of me shut it off. Poor sleep, constant worrying about the kiddo, worrying about money, the future, LIFE. So worried, that I’m having trouble actually living that life that I’m so worried about.

So, basically, I’m relapsing. HOWEVER, I think I’m handling things better than I would have before. Before I read that amazing article and had a real personal transformation. I’m still a basket case some days. But not quite the basket case I would have been had I not forced myself to sit down and confront these worrying and anxiety demons.

So, that’s progress, right?

Taking a deep breath. Re-reading the article. Thanks for listening.

5 comments on “Group Therapy: The Other Shoe

  1. Hi Beth,
    I’m sorry you are suffering from anxiety. You are younger than me, but I’ve been dealing with what I think is some early hormonal anxiety. Panic attacks, sleeplessness and stuff. So in some sense I understand how disruptive and disturbing worry and anxiety can be.

    This is tangential, but I have been reading a couple of books (feminist books, gasp!) that have given me a sense of how to broaden my world in order to relieve the closed-in pressure, the private pain, the interiority (is that a word?) we often feel being full-time mothers. For the most part The Feminine Mystique by Betty Friedan was a revelation to me, historically, socially, and personally (a couple of chapters are dated, but much of it is amazingly–perhaps somewhat depressingly–fresh). And for a more contemporary viewpoint I am reading Judith Warner’s Perfect Madness: Motherhood in the Age of Anxiety. These are of course general and not specific to your personal worries. But maybe general enough to help you put your preoccupations in a broader context. Deep breaths. ALSO, exercise!!!!!! The best thing for your mental health.

    1. Thanks Erika! You are so sweet. I actually read The Feminine Mystique in college, but perhaps time for a re-read. I think my issues could be stemming from 1. being laid off last year and not finding gainful employment (where we can also afford child care) since, 2. being at home all the time with Bowie for the last 2 years (preschool is helping so much with this) and 3. also hormonal stuff, as the women in my family tend to go through these things a little on the early side. I went off the pill several months ago and that helped a lot too. Also, started exercising regularly just recently. I’m hoping all this combined is the key to kicking anxiety to the curb for good. But, I’m also checking out some therapists that take our insurance, just to try it out, see if it helps. Thanks again, glad to know I’m not the only worry wart out there.

      1. I think the Feminine Mystique has new relevance when you’re in the thick of motherhood, and since you’ve already read it you could skip around. The other book I mentioned is really very good. You could probably get it at the library.

        Sounds like you have things well in hand though, with some really concrete steps toward “kicking it to the curb!!” Here’s to your success and good health!

  2. I think we worry because we don’t want to be blindsided by something bad happening. We believe it prepares us. Most of the things we worry about never happen and we are still taken by surprise by whatever bad things do happen to us. Try to start “worrying” about the good things that can happen. Coming from a chronic worrier, this does help. There is no cure except to be mindful when you are going off in the wrong direction and set yourself back on the right thought path.

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