I am going off of the birth control pill. I am taking my last pill on Saturday night, and then that’s it. No, we’re not trying to have another baby. Because we’re not ready. Well, we are, but we aren’t. And we are. But we’re not. I know you know what I mean.
The reason I want to stop taking it is that I have been completely miserable for the better part of the last 18 months, and the more reading/talking/advice-seeking I do, the more I am convinced that the pill is to blame for all of it.
If you are a regular reader, you will remember when the trouble started. After I weaned Bowie from the breast, and went from the mini-pill back to the regular pill. Remember all those months of “holy crap, I thought I was pregnant again this month” posts? Only got WORSE as time went on. Until last month, when I was so sick, so tired, so mood-swingy, so hungry, so fat, so needing to pee every 5 seconds, that I was convinced–CONVINCED–we were expecting baby #2.
But no! Not pregnant! Just having trouble with the hormones RAGING THROUGH MY BODY. So, after talking to a few friends, my mother, and the good old Interwebz, I have made the decision to take a break from the pill.
The nausea, the weight gain, the depression, the fatigue, the appetite, the mood swings, the panic attacks, the near-fainting, the crying, the lack of (ahem) libido. Turns out, it can all be attributed to hormonal imbalance. I’m really, really hoping it all goes away.
And if it doesn’t? I don’t know. I guess I will go get some blood work done because, WTF BODY, THIS IS NOT NORMAL. I want to feel good again. I want to have energy. I want to be able to be in a crowd without heart palpitations. I want to go to bed happy, not sad. I want to stop needing food every hour. I want to lose 10 pounds!!! Hoping I get there. Thanks for coming along on the ride with me.